Fear doesn’t have to be the enemy

Previously published May 13, 2014 at www.leadmeforward.com *Revised in 2020

by Erica Pearson

My phone buzzed. I looked down to read my text.

Is worry a sin?

Give me a minute to compose myself. I replied

I am very passionate about this subject and I knew I needed to take a deep breath before I responded. I instantly remembered these words I wrote in 2014.

Why do we as Christians not allow one another to feel fear?  On more than one occasion I have seen the chance to encourage one another with God’s Word be turned into a belittling session in God’s name over the issue of – FEAR.  I’ve even been personally chastised over not having “enough faith” in God when I chose to be transparent and admit I was fearful or anxious about certain situations.

Why am I writing about Fear when I started with a text over Worry?

Can you name a worry that didn’t first start with fear?

The ROOT of worry is fear, so this is the issue we need to deal with.

Conversations and experiences have prompted me to ask this question:

“What is it that causes us to be real with God (and each other) about every other emotion besides fear?”  

We seem to believe that within each of us is some kind of “faith meter”.  As if we could determine where someone stands with God based on how they are feeling.  In my own experience, if I ever mention being fearful of a certain situation, my “meter” is assumed to be on empty. In fact, I was pregnant with my 2nd child during Swine Flu season. I was trying to talk with a colleague about how I was feeling, only to be met with their observation of “I thought you had more faith than that Erica?.

In a Classic Christianity, Bob George offers some much needed truth on the issue of “Faith Meters”. He points out that too many of us are confusing God’s standards with people’s standards, and we are making ourselves sick over it.

“Yet, they walk around every day feeling that God is sick to His stomach over them because of their failure to live up to His standards. Often, though, it’s not even God’s standards that they are trying to keep, but regulations imposed by themselves or other people. There is a certain mind-set that is especially destructive, called the “Phantom Christian.” The “Phantom Christian” is that imaginary person that many of us are continually comparing ourselves to…..this “Phantom Christian” lives as a vague ghost in the back of our minds, creating a sense of failure to measure up. That is the reason why many Christians live under continual guilt. If the “Phantom Christian” is the standard for acceptance, then God seems a million miles away, sitting with His arms folded in disapproval. ” Bob George

Was my “faith meter” running on empty in the midst of Swine Flu?

Nothing could have been farther from the truth!

I was clinging to the Cross. It was my faith in God that caused me to look up and ask Him for help.

My human emotions may fail me, but my faith in God never does. I take comfort in the fact there are several examples in scripture of Christ followers who felt fear, my favorite example being Peter.

Peter stepped bravely out of the boat only to be overcome with fear at the sight of the crashing waves. Did he somehow, at that moment, lose all faith in God and give up? No!

In fact, I believe it was his faith that caused him to quickly look back up at the one who could save him and take the extended hand of His Lord. If he had somehow lost his faith due to fear, we would read of Jesus having to pick up a flailing, panicked Peter out of the water.

Based on my personal experience here is what I have come to believe about the emotion we call fear:

Fear is not the absence of faith; if allowed it can fuel faith.

Without fear, I would feel invincible. Without fear, I would not seek God. Without fear, I would blindly believe I was in control. I am learning not to feel like a failure when I feel fear or anxiety. I know that fear is a thorn in my flesh. I have begged and pleaded with the Lord to take it away, only to find the same response Paul received when he begged to have a similar thorn taken from his flesh: My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).  Therefore I can also say, “I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses (fears), so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”

There is a current Pandemic. Are you afraid if you share your struggles, your faith will be seen as lacking? Have you tried to reach for help on Social Media only to be met with a belittling session.

Allow me to be the first to say it.

I. AM. AFRAID.

I am a believer and I am afraid. This is scary. It is perfectly OK to be afraid about scary things!

Am I living in fear? No. Do I have moments of fear? Absolutely.

In the book Emotional Agility, Susan David has this to say about dealing with emotions:

“The process (Emotional Agility) isn’t about ignoring difficult emotions and thoughts. It’s about holding those emotions and thoughts loosely, facing them courageously and compassionately, and then moving past them to make big things happen in your life.” Susan David

God’s Word does not say that we are to ignore our emotions, it says we are to share one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2).

Let’s get real and begin to really help one another through this. Let us PRAY TOGETHER. Encourage one another. Check in. Listen. Love.

Don’t hesitate another moment to find a friend and take your burdens to the throne room, knowing He is waiting to meet you there. He is NOT sitting with His arms crossed in disapproval of your fear. He has His arms open waiting to embrace YOU. He is not social distancing. He is waiting with an embrace we all desperately need.

From my stirred (and yes fearful) heart to yours,

Erica